Into the breech of our life comes the sight of the other we might chance to love. It comes out of the blue. They enter the room and you look and it’s decided right then.
Not for all of us. Some of us sneak up on it. We go to school with them, work with them; see them out at the grocery store, dancing.
I was made to love. Comes right out of me, it is spontaneous, voluntary, willful. I’ve never hesitated. Might have been a hole in my game, if you call love a game, it is rather more like fateful choices we make or undo with our life.
I’m interested in the people who I call my friends that find it difficult not so much to love but difficult to form a lasting bond with the new partner. It is as if my heart came with an instruction manual and there hearts manual was indecipherable.
Some people are discouraged by how the nature of this love literally changes chemically over time. They are confused by the feelings that come with a lasting mature relationship. Loves onset is pyrotechnic… incendiary… passionate… where the long game is played upon a field of tender gauze.
Not only can hot new relationships become an end in themselves, they can be just what the doctor ordered for the long term relationship that you are trying to get over.
Expectations, patterns, habits, they become engrained in us and after a few death rattles as your life long love turns into something much less life long well you know, easy come easy go, soon you don’t even love, you simply visit it, tour its region, take a few memories, and like a holiday return home and back to your solitude.
Freedom is available to all of us. We are free to have or not have whatever we want. So we might invoke the courage in our souls to actually take the opportunity to create the love that our hearts whisper into our beings and encourage us to create
I hear the instructions, I know what to do. My heart has convinced me that I can love with all my heart across the whole of eternity. Fool that I am, I am convinced it’s true.
We can explore the mystery of life long commitment like an astronaut or mountain climber, and we can rise to this daring challenge by loving as if the whole of our happiness and fateful life depends upon it.
A fall can prove fatal and the courage to explore the magnificence of what we tease out our hearts can over a lifetime leave the world that much more saturated in the gleaming splendor of a choiceless freely given love that thrives in the garden of our brave souls.
It is why we begin with a casual date… nothing too fateful at first. Then, the gods laugh and sprinkle the magic fairy dust over us, and like that it begins anew, again and again….
BANKRUPT HEART
